I was reading GQ the other day (I have not read a GQ in decades, but picked one up randomly while at the airport a couple weeks ago) and their Joke of the Month page has a few ‘overheard’ announcements from Australian Airline attendants trying to make the announcements a bit more interesting. A few that made me laugh out loud:

• Before takeoff:  "Welcome aboard. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt – and if you don’t know how to operate it, you probably shouldn’t be out in public unsupervised"
• During the safety briefing:  "In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask and pull it over your face. If you have small children travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting them. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favourite"
• On departure: "Please be sure to take your belongings with you. If you’re going to leave anything, please make sure it’s something we’d like to have"
• The farewell announcement: "We’d like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting  through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you’ll think of us"

From that same article, Michael McIntye:

"They’ve got their own money in Scotland. It’s still the pound, but it’s their own pound. They were offered their own currency but they thought ‘That’s too complicated mathematically, let’s just have your notes with our photos on it’ Have you ever tried to use Scottish money in England? There’s nothing more tense in life. When you hand it over, they look at you like you’ve just handed them a dead baby"

I laughed when I read this one. It is so true. When we went to Scotland we ended up with a bunch of their notes. I had one English fellow tell me that he didn’t know what they were but he wasn’t going to accept them (LOL). And of course, a guy without a British accent (Have I explained how I have no accent yet?) wasn’t going to convince him that it was legal tender. No way, no how.

A few other tidbits:

Best Life (the now dead magazine) had an interesting tidbit on roundabouts:

"… roundabouts move 30 percent more vehicles than traffic signals do … Their circular shape makes all the drivers travel in the same direction and this reduces serious crashes such as head on collisions by about 90%. "

The Brits have this one right. Ban all stop signs, I can’t stand them. They are so inefficient. Bring the roundabout to Canada.

The race to build a good music distribution system is getting more interesting. The Sonos is the most popular, but for those of us who have a home with prewired speakers, Logitech’s Squeezebox Duet is very compelling and half the cost:

Play songs stored on your PC or Mac in your den through the home stereo in your living room. No need to run wires or bring your computer to the living room to listen to your favourite tunes. Play your favourite tracks from the palm of your hand with the color remote.

All you need to get started is a Wi-Fi connection. Simply plug the Squeezebox (TM) Duet receiver into your home stereo system, bedroom stereo or kitchen audio system—anywhere you have audio gear. With the intuitive remote control, it’s easier than ever to browse, select and play your favourite music or discover new music.

So many choices.